Tag Archives: haterade

PUGtales: Macros For The Insane

Herald Volazj Isn't The Only One Who Makes Us Crazy

I WANT- NAY, need- to make /partyspeak macros for the most virulently bad heal-ees out there. I’m tired of trying to splutter out something insulting on the fly. We must codify our rage, and it would behoove us to pool our resources.

So, what would be your macro response to:

  • “why u no heal me?”
  • “rex plz”
  • Pulls while you’re drinking
  • Soultap
  • DPS aggro-draw

I’ll post the list of winners, along with codes for all the macros, up hynah when we’re found our winners.

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PUGtales: That’s A Dealbreaker

It's Cool, I'll Catch Up When You Die

BY AND LARGE, I’m a fairly relaxed pick-up group healer. I don’t mind group buffing, I don’t shout at people for standing in fire (as an inveterate firestander myself), and I even like the noobs, since my mad skillz generally elicit oohs and aahs of appreciation from the 80 Wario tank with the 921 gearscore and gives me a chance to wallow and kiss my muscle-bubbles.

But there is some shit up with which I shall not put. I’m not sure if I’m being unbearably tetchy or exercising my inescapable priestly neuroticism; either way, pull any of this crap on our watch, and priests will laugh while you die:

  1. Tanktation:

    The tank dictates to the group how this is all gonna roll, assuming that despite the fact they are graceless anti-people failures, tank=boss. Last night I pulled a PUG into Halls of Lightning. No one said anything as we busily buffed, and then the tank says, “We’re hitting all the bosses. I want emblems.” /dropgroup.

  2. Tankrollers:

    A recent PUG dropped me in Hall of Lightning, and into the good graces of a tankroller- let’s call him Spambot. Spambot heads off running before the sparkles have died away from the first buff, which is always a bad sign. I was itching for a stack of Triumph and let him run. First mob, second mob, third mob, straight into the boss- no comments, no mana stops, no nothing- and then straight into the boss and into the fifth, sixth, and seventh mobs.At this point, natch, I’m thinking that this guy is a total gold farmer, but his gear is thoughtfully selected and very high level; plus, he’s said one or two things that don’t sound like macros. We run through the mob of lava elementals (not waiting for the lone mage at the back of the group- too bad for you, suckah!), start beating them off on the stairs, and Spambot pulls the next mob.I yell at him to wait, he says, “o sry”, then our hunter- the best DPS- goes up the wrong staircase. He’s stuck between mobs at the top and bottom, very politely mentions this, and we say we’ll go to the right and take care of the top of stairs mob to get him out. ‘We’, I guess, meaning the rest of the group- the tank pulls the mob on the left and starts fighting his way to the boss. I let him wipe to make a point, rez, and try to rebuff. But Spambot runs to the boss, slashes away with no regard to the fact that the main DPS is trapped on the stairs, needs on the dropped loot (I healed the hunter as he fought his own way out of the stairs), and dashes down the hall of kill-you statues with everyone on half health and me oom.

    See you round, dingus.

  3. Noobhaters:

    Tanks are by and large the worst offenders, but anyone can be a noobhater.  A recent Halls of Reflection group (clearly, the Halls of anything is cursed) took a pretty bad toll on our PUG, partially due to the low DPS of a very undergeared hunter. But he was polite. He was trying.The much-better mage would not let up, though, making snide comments about Hunter’s gear, overall lack of skill, and general failure at life. To the surprise of all, mage dies repeatedly. Totally inexplicable.

  4. Fucking Warlocks:

    Swear to God.

  5. Remana, We Hardly Knew Ye:

    It’s rare that I go oom these days, but it used to be that a tank would keep one eye on my bar and stop to let everyone remana before a boss fight. Sometimes I needed it, often I didn’t, but it was a nice and thoughtful touch. Since the implementation of the PUGfinder, I can count on one hand how often a tank has mentioned stopping because I’m low.Tanks seem to no longer consider it a part of their job, which is inexcusable. DKs are the worst offenders, natch. While it’s not a guaranteed dealbreaker, if I’ve just run three bad instances, this will prompt a group drop.

What are your priestly dealbreakers?

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