So I’ve come to an interesting impasse in my new guild, and I know my intrepid readers are just the ones to mull it over (or, failing that, revel in a good failguild story).
After a somewhat stressful raid evening (beating ourselves against the good Professor, that old so-and-so), our guild went on a ten-minute, well-deserved break. I ended up alone in Vent with a fellow guild member I’d run with a few times.
Since he and I were alone, I tried to keep up some conversation to pass the time. I shot the breeze about the raid, and was complimenting the guy’s skills in the instance when he interrupted me with, “Do you ever shut the fuck up?”
I was pretty surprised, but gamely replied, “Ha, sorry, I know I do talk a lo-“
“Seriously shut up. Seriously shut up. Seriously shut up. Seriously shut up,” he responded.
Now, gentle reader, I’m not gonna lie to you. I was pretty mad. But as mad as I was, I didn’t want to say something I’d regret. I turned off Vent without saying anything, or even explaining to the rest of the guild where I’d gone (rude, I know- but man, steam was coming out of my ears).
After cooling off for a few minutes, I sent a tell to the player along the lines of, “I’ve always enjoyed playing with you, but it’s cool if the feeling’s not mutual. But it’s not cool to be rude to me in Vent.”
Everyone came back from the break. We finished the raid, and I went off to quest with an old friend to simmer down a bit. Eventually- I’m embarrassed to say it- I was so pissed that I put the guy on Ignore.
Here’s where we reach the conundrum: What next?
When we play- and it is the most glorious kind of play, the fun we have in WoW- many of us value the lighthearted camaraderie brought by being a member of a diverse band of misfits who would never, ever, in a million years, become friends in the normal course of our lives. It’s an overwhelming touching thing to me, and lies at the heart of why I play.
Now, for the first time in four years, I don’t want to play any more.
We all face these conundrums in guilds, in PUGs, in life both pixelated and organic. So what do we do when our gaming lives get complicated and snarled for reasons that make both sides indignant and hurt?
Offer it up, gentle readers, and let’s see if we can solve it together.